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The Help-Meet Series: She Speaks The Right Words

Posted By: TheCounselor™          In: Marriage Secrets          1066 Views         (Aug 08, 2017)

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 The Help-Meet Series: She Speaks The Right Words

When she speaks, her words are wise and she gives instruction with kindness            Prov. 31:26

That is the description of the words that should be heard from a helpmeet. Truth be told, the tongue is hard to control but as a helpmeet, your tongue should be under control and the right words should proceed from your mouth at all times even in the face of provocation. You should not be one to pride yourself in the fact that you are known in your neighborhood or among friends as the one that is quick to start arguments; use abusive words, engage in fights, gossiping and backbiting, complaining, nagging. Worse, to be known in your home as the one whose tongue has the capacity to set your house on fire? These are a sign of the misuse of the tongue.

James 4: 1- 12 emphasizes on the use and control of the tongue. As a helpmeet, you need to use your tongue to the advantage of your husband and marriage.

Speaking the right words cannot be over-emphasized; especially to our husbands and in our homes. Your words carry power. Words are seeds. Even God waits for what you’ll say (Numbers 14: 28). Our words must be seasoned with salt at all times and as the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31, wisdom should be heard in the words we speak and kindness should also be felt when we open our mouths. Knowing that the words we say go a long way to build or to destroy. Death and life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it shall eat the fruit thereof. Prov. 18: 21. Therefore, you can build your homes by what you say or destroy it. You can make or break your husband. You can show respect or disrespect for your husband by your words. You can increase his confidence or decrease it by your words. You can draw him close to you or send him far away by your words. You can bring him blessings and favor or curses and disfavor by just saying it.

You have the power in your tongue so speak the right words to him. According to James 4; Blessings and curses should not proceed from the same mouth; fresh and bitter water should not come out from the same place. Therefore, Love and honor your husband with your words. Appreciate him with your words. Encourage him. Support him with your words. Bless him don’t curse him. Don’t attack him with your words; let it shield him instead. Don’t bring him down with your words, lift him up. Even when you think he does not deserve any nice word by virtue of his attitude or actions, you have to consciously speak the right words to him in public or private whether you feel like it or not. Let him feel the kindness in your words. Help him with your words not wound him. In the place of prayer and in your normal day’s activities, speak the right words into his life; call forth the positive things you would love to see into his life.  In the morning, afternoon, night; in his presence or at his back; before your friends; say the right things about him.  When it seems like the answer to your prayers is delayed; speak the right words continuously. Speaking the right words to him will allow effective communication. No man would love to stay in the same house with a nagging and complaining woman?

In speaking rightly, make effort to listen more and be slow to speak and when you eventually speak, choose your words carefully because you know that once you’ve said it, you cannot take it back. The wrong words can hurt him and ruin your marriage. Be eager to settle misunderstandings amicably knowing that a soft answer turns away wrath and calms a lot of tension. Don’t let anger cause you to say words that you would regret later. Sow the right seeds with your words. Most of all, ask God for wisdom and help to always know when to speak to your husband or to be quiet; what to say and how to say it and the right timing in saying it to him.

James 4: 2 says; “For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way”.

This also shows that many troubles can be caused by the wrong words. Using your tongue well can make your marriage work for you not against you. Using your tongue rightly especially as a helpmeet can put other parts of your life in order especially your marriage. Remember, we are not moved by our feelings but by the spirit of God inside of us.

Tags:      The help meet  marriage 

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The Help-Meet Series: She Speaks The Right Words
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